YOU ARE THE MOST UNDESERVING PERSON I'VE EVER KNOWN!


I hate being second fiddle.



Have been gng into th theatres alot these few days. Watched ALL th CNY films which I think are all o-k-a-y only. Fann&Chris show is rly allabout Fann&Chris but wellllllllllll, I LIKE(: Yeaps. I've no clue why am I at home tday when I should be enjoying my last two days of hols but I rly don't feel like gng out at all, lol. Sorrrrrrrrry!

Went t th Dentist on Thurs! AND I DON'T NEED TO SEE HIM ANYMOREEEEEEEE (Haha!), at least until six months laterrrrrrrr! flash my pearly whites!

Got school shoes and water bottle alrdyyyyyyz. Now all I need is a new prettaye pencil case! :D

Sounds like I'm pretty excited t go t sch, ya. Well, I'm a littttttttttle bit sick of slacking and nua-ing at home alrdy; it's very not enriching. BUT... RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHS! I will just make th best of it man.


Out of NCHS and now suddenly I feel so out of place as well.

No options, I headache. Now got options, I also headache. I should go bang my head on th walllllll.


I feel so tired. I should go sleep. I haven't been sleeping well. And, Message in a Bottle is awesomez to th maximum.

Well, it's 3pm right now; I shall just spend th rest of th day staring at my phone, praying that it rings, read book and fall asleep. Holiday days won't be any longer. Two more days and that's all I've got, before I start travelling 2 hours everyday for at least th whole of next week. Good luck to me.


Talking about books, LEE SHU HUI, GO RETURN TH LIBRARY BOOKS AHHHHHHHH. Kz.

Now listening to : 无乐不作

Maybe some things are better left unrevealed, because at least th balance will still be there. I realised only today, how much. It scares me t know exactly how much. I kind of get thrown off th balance and is super distracted, somehow or another. This feeling leaves me feeling damn emotional but there is nothing I can do about it but just shutting up and moving on. Why does it have to impact me so much? Why can't I just be as nonchalant? It really freak me out a little bit. Everything seems to remind me so much. Oh shucks. Just give it up.

Or maybe, a leap of faith is what I need. I don't know.

I'm scared.


HAPPY NIU YEAR ANW !
Like I said, I actually hate CNY alot, yea.

I shall see how I survive th next few days. There is [V] Power concert on teevee tmr, that better last me for awhile manz.

Now listening to : Cry

Landon: Jamie, I love you.
[long pause]
Landon: Now would be the time to say something.
Jamie: I told you not to fall in love with me.

The feeling is back. I want my own copy of th book, and also t watch th movie again. I think I'm kind of crazy but omg, I rly love this story alot.

Now I shall go load The Notebook movie and watch it. It may be nice. Th book is fantasticfabulouswonderfulzaiawesomeness.

I hate CNYs, other than th pineapple tarts and angpows. I just hope I will survive th whole CNY. ):

Now listening to : Your Call

Out w Jennnnnnnnnnn tday; out with Jen is always mellow. But I like. She's my mellowmellowmarshmellow friend, lol!

Ice monster is pwnsome, durian + mango = LOVE!

AND, my very thinkeverybodyelseisveryold best friend thinks that Michelle Chia is FORTY. She once tell me Fiona Xie/Cyndi Wang is forty and Demi Moore is fifty la. SHE PWN LA, LIKE THAT ALSO CAN.

I CHECKED ONLINE ANYWAY. MICHELLE CHIA IS 33 THIS YEAR! YOU OWE ME A MEAL MANNNNZ.

Watched this rllllllly crappy Jack Neo movie which I think is his worse yet. So yaaaaaaaa, you know how bad that is. LOL! I cringed at half th scenes. Th god brother and son could have been hotter, then th movie might still be palatable. Er, ya. LOL.

I really hope th other movies will be damn awesomez. Movieeeeeeees with Jennnnnn sooon.

I LOVE YOU LA ATN! (:

Being with my darling booklover best friend means we shop at every, and I do mean every bookshop which is totally awesomez. I want Nicholas Sparks booooooooks. YESSAH!


Momo told me that Fairprice closes at two tdayyyyyyyyy. Anybody on for an adventure ? HEH. (:

I feel like crap right now. Thank you very much.

G'night.

Now listening to: Best of Me

14th JAN

I'm not ready t start school yet. If I get into a JC, I will be starting school on th 2nd. Which also means that it will start in aproximatelyyy twelve days. That's kind of scary. New environment, new friends, new everything! It's verrrrrrry scary. And also esp th fact that I told Peccy abouttttttttt. I scaredz.


And, one more silly fact:

Jay Chou is thirteeeeeeeeeee.
Yes, no (n).

He's oldddddddddd. But not cranky.


Kayz. Actually, I do have alot of photos, but no mood and time t blog abt it. Soon soon soon. When Jen comes back from chalet and I get th playground photos from that cranky old girl who I saw at EHub yesterday. Kz. And also pictures from Eeeeeechen. Then I will blog ALL th photos. Yessah.


Mom took leave t 大扫除. I need t clear my landmine! ):

JAE ended, I'm veryveryveryveryvery glad. I shall just keep my fingers crossed.


This week had been busyyyyyz.


Sunday
Out with Jen cos we both are veryveryvery scared we will breakdown and be crazie if we stay home and face our parents. So we went Taka t shop for present for Jen's dad and then down t J8 for Swensens supper. Then we two decided t walk our way from Bishan, we gave up at Serangoon. I reached home at near midnight.

Then conferenced with Jen, Jovyn and Minron until I fell asleepz.


Monday
Met up with Jen, Jovyn, Minron, Chengsiang, Yuting and Minron's friend for teochew porridge for breakfast.

I was a nervous wreck when I went t school. Sat around Olivia, Eechen and Regina, we were like grabbing each other hands. And I was getting more butterflies as Mr. Ong decided t talk even slower, lol.

Got my results.

Went J8 with Olivia and Eechen t meet Felicia. Ate at KFC and walked around abit.

Then went t meet Mom for dinner, yea.


Tuesday
Went with Jen t see TPJC, th damn security guard refused t let us into th stupid school laaaa. So we went Cathay t meet Jovyn, Kimli and their friend. Ate at a random Japanese buffet.

Then home I go.

I think I was rllllllllllllly moody that day. ):


Wednesday
Out with Regina t NCHS t ask th teachers for advice, then t NYJC for enquires and then t TPJC for more enquires. Got all I need t know and everything, lol.

I think it's your face leh Jen, th security guard let us in that dayyyyy, lol!

Went home t change and met up with Peccy. Went for dinner at BK, lol! And then we shopped abit. I DIDN'T BUY ANYTHINGGGGG! LOL. We were having fun at Page One tho, lol.


Thursday
Out with Olivia and Peccy! Shopppppppingz. But I didn't get anything AGAIN. ): Feel so emo, lol. Olivia got a dress and a belt while Eechen got a dressssssssss.

New year is cominggggggg. ):

I WANT TO GO SHOPPING AGAINNNNNNNN!


Friday
JC visiting with Mom againnnnnnn. I then had finally made my decisions which is rlllllllly awesome! :D Then went for buffet at Scotts Hotel and then more shopping which I came home with a necklace. -.- LOL.


YOU, YES YOU. TRUST ME, A GIRL'S INSTINCT IS VERYVERYVERY ACCURATE. I SHOULD KNOW ANYWAY, COS I'M IN THE SAME BOAT AS HER. YES, I'M TALKING ABOUT YOU.


P.s. I haven't seen angtuanning in ages.
P.p.s. I WANT T GO SHOPPPPPPPPING.

Half th time, I just feel fcked up and screwed. Th other half, I'm feeling damn frantic.

How nice.

I have been a mean bitch these two days. Snapping at people who cares for me, crying at everyfckngthing and being as busy as I can be. I know you care, but somehow it feels interfering. Just leave me alone if I don't reply, I will be able t laugh over it soon, yessah.


Shopping tmr! I hope it will be damn zaizxzzzxzxzx. (:

I cried.

I srsly gave up on th I-won't-cry-no-matter-what rubbish once I'm in school! I was so clammy and cold and freaking scaredz. And I cried once I got my results, calculated it and looked at Regina.

Feel so CRANKY AND OLD.
):

I'm disappointed, but nothing can be done anymore right now. So I should just shut up and continue with life. I will try t snap out of it soon.


I CAN'T DO IT, yet.

Went AJC Open house w Jenniferang. I think we are both in a kind of cui mood tday, but th topic-of-th-day was VERY entertaining, ya!

More later.



HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOEL! :D (kind of belated) GET WELL SOON!


Nobody seems t unds my fear, everybody thinks I'm thinking too much/ask me t don't think. Srsly, it had been on my mind since two days back la; or rather, for th past two months except that now, th fear has came back stronger and more prominent. It kind of suck yknow. I don't know how t explainnnnnnn. I totally know it's nobody's fault but mine, but ya, hanging out with Parry people kind of makes me feel more stressed/depressed than ever, like whatever actually went wrong with my secondary years if all th Parry pple are doing so shuperduperchaoji well and everything. Argggggggggg! I shall just hope for th best.

I am v tired. Tired physically and mentally. It just keep bugging moi.

I want t borrow New Moon from Jen and just absorb myself in th Edward Cullen fantasy. AHHHHHHH. Shall go read Eclipse, heh. :D


I need t talk t someone who can unds my feelings.


NAP TIME


//edit

I woke up from my nap at 3.36am t be exact. I've no idea why but I couldn't sleeeeeeepz anymore. I napped after watching my Machi Boy! :D & after pizza hut delivery dinnerrrrrrrr, I don't like th double cheese thing lol. I prefer my 6.80$ student meal pan pizza, srsly. LOL.

And so, I've totally missed th enthuMSNtimingz, lol. ):

Van left a uber long comment, read it for yourself. And yes, that's exactly how I'm feeling. I feel so dead and arg, I'm enjoying my hols so much that I srsly have no intention of ruining th remainder of it. Shucks, th emo kind of feeling is backkkkkkkk. But I still love you, Vannnnnn.

I've been prancing around too much on Facebook. I shall go watch some TV/get irritated by some Ponyo Ponyo advertisement orrrrrrrrrr just go sleep.

G'night.

Went Singapore Poly open house w Jenniferang tday. SP is

BIG

I was feeling so lost at th start & was wondering if I should go in at all. LOL. Thank God for Gekshan who brought us arounddddddddd. She is th best, mannnnnn. :D LOVEHER!

Then we "coincidentally" met up with Chengsiang, Minron, Jovyn and Jovyn's friend, slacked abit at th cafe, heh. LOL. Then went home with Chengkor, Minron and Jen, crapping th whole way la; th FAST&FURIOUS bus journey is shuper long. So silly. Jen's voice is srslyyyyyyy naturally loud. LOL! And Minron, you laugh like a prawn. :D And Chengsiang was v sad he didn't get his goodie baggggg. Awwwww. LOL.


And I just happened t read th SEAB website. We have t pay t get posted t JC/Poly/ITE leh! LOL. 7 bucks or something. It's kind of dumb, is this paying for th salary of th peoples who sort us t schs? . . . Can go bribe them or sth, LOL! Joking.


Kk. I feel kind of crazieee right now. In a melancholy kind of mood. LOL. :D


I've been telling everybody, and I do mean everybody that I'm scaredddddz abt 12th Jan. Th three guys who went SP tday srsly just went for goodie bags/fun/waste time 'cos Chengsiang has IP program, Jovyn alrdy DPA into his best-campus poly (LOL!) and Minron is srsly confirmed a 6 pointer. AHHHHHHHH. Feel so stressed and not-so-smart.

Not trying t imply I'm dumb. :D

Now listening to : Love Me